This Sunday is Mother’s Day. If you desperately desire to be a mother, but for whatever reason are not, my heart goes out to you.
I know this day reminds you so deeply of what you do not have. It’s a day filled with reminders. A day that’s hard to escape those emotions you’d rather keep at bay. A day when the yearning is extra strong. I see you. I know your struggle.
I’m not going to tell you to be positive, to not give up hope, or to be grateful for what you do have. To do this would only diminish what you may be feeling. Instead, I want to say show yourself extra love this Mother’s Day. This is a day to do whatever you need to take care of yourself.
So, on Mother’s Day, I ask you…
What if just for this day you made yourself a priority?
What if just for this day you allowed yourself to acknowledge the pain and grief you feel of not being a mother?
What if just for this day you gave yourself permission to gently and lovingly decline any invitations that do not make you feel good?
What if just for this day you completely nourished yourself with things that fill your cup, things that brought you joy?
What if this Mother’s Day you created a special day made up of whatever you need? If that means protecting yourself by shutting out the rest of the world, do that. If it means buying yourself flowers, pampering yourself, and having a long bubble bath, do that. If it means calling a friend and having some fun, do that. If it means stocking up on chocolate chip ice-cream and a giant bag of M&Ms and watching your favourite rom coms, do that.
It’s okay to put yourself first. It’s okay to be as kind to yourself. And it’s okay to shower yourself with love.
This infertility business is tough. Give yourself permission to do whatever it is you need this Mother’s Day. You deserve it.